3. NO ONE CAN TELL YOU WHAT TO DO. No one else is living your life. No one else is going to live with the outcome of the decisions you make right now (although they may be more than eager to tell you what to do). The key is to get as much perspective as you can by reading books, joining teleseminars, and talking to others who understand (by perhaps joining a BAN support group.) Then in the end, you decide what’s right for you. Even if this husband maintains feelings for this other woman, no one can tell you that you have to leave. YOU DECIDE WHAT YOUR BOUNDARIES ARE. What is and isn’t okay with you.
The truth is, my experiment in smelling like an adolescent male for a week had only two really profound consequences. One, I really did grow to love the fragrance. And no. I don’t want to talk about it. But two, and distinctly more important, both my kids were so embarrassed that they stopped using it within days of my initiating the experiment. Smell you later, Axe. It turns out that there is some Freudian window in which smelling like your mom is so beyond contemplation that they wordlessly gave it up altogether. Indeed, they have both moved quite deliberately backward to the Suave Baby Shampoo, which is precisely where I would like them to stay, at least for a while. And thus, drenched in the smell of rusting metal, we all take two steps away from the Axe years, the entitled years, the boom-chicka-wah-wah years, that are bearing down upon us too quickly.
Burke is a motivational speaker whose book about dealing with grief is a best seller. His wife died in a car accident three years ago. He's in Seattle to lead a week-long workshop on healing and to negotiate a major multi-media deal. But something's amiss: he's a closet drinker, he won't ride elevators, his moods swing, he's estranged from his wife's father, and he's very much alone. In a hotel hallway, he bumps into a woman arranging flowers, tries to chat with her, and gets the brush-off. She's Eloise, a local florist who's just broken up with a boyfriend. He's persistent and they eventually go to dinner - it goes badly. What's blocking Burke? Can the physician heal himself. Written by <jhailey@>